Eight gun shots directly into the torso and still living, slowly breathing until the owner came home and saw his best friend exhaling his final breaths. Officer Tuscairt (the actual name of the officer is unknown to us at the time of this writing, we are presently trying to acquire Officer Tuscairt’s real name.) shot a dog 8 times, little did Officer Tuscairt know that the real bitch on crack was working the corners on the other side of town. Sorry, I had to leave that one in there. After shooting the dog eight times, the dog was still living. Obviously Officer Tuscairt’s last name is Cantduit-Ryteneeder.
It seems to me with more recent anti-self defense bills rising up in Baton Rouge, most notably HB 68 filed by Representative Cedric Richmond D-New Orleans (*of course he’s a Democrat), that these politicians who continue to file these bills are either stupid or just dangerous. Ignorant could no longer be a possibility since they’ve had to have heard each side of the argument a thousand times.
But I’m going to go out on a limb and abandon my conservative principles and join the Democrats in their stupidity… on one condition, that they be more “inclusive” and less discriminatory in who they think passes as a ‘responsible citizen deserving of rights’ that they, of course, give us permission to exercise. I think Cedric Richmond should lead by example and should add into that bill, that is to offer up an amendment to his own bill that prohibits an elected official from being able to own a gun. Representative Richmond ought to lead by example, as should the rest of the state legislatures who are considering voting for this bill.
And not to be out done by Representative Cedric Richmond and the rest of his self-serving morally superior buddies who knows what’s best for the self defense of your family, I too wish to impose a more self serving morally superior amendment to the bill. Though I’m not a legislature, I know what’s good for other people too. How many more innocent pets must die at the hands of police before we do something? How many more innocent lives will be lost before you’ll care? I think we must act now and stop future murders of innocent pets from police officers who were forced by their evil guns to kill the innocent pet. Officers should not have guns either, it’s not safe and I want you to be safe too. I know some of you are for the death of innocent animals, (especially those folks over at PETA)
I also know what some of you are thinking, as a self serving morally superior person does, I will tell everybody what you are thinking too. You’re thinking, “But Avster, if policeman aren’t allowed to have guns, won’t criminals still have guns?” to which cats like Representative Cedric Richmond and I balk at such stupid insinuations. With all the gun control laws on the books already, there is absolutely no way bad guys can get guns nowadays. It’s just a figment of your imagination that bad guys have guns. In fact, there are no such things such as bad people, just bad guns like “assault rifles” or guns that shoot “bullets”.
You see, Officer Tuscairt Cantduit-Ryteneeder is an innocent victim in all this. Officer Tuscairt wasn’t afraid of the dog, the gun was fearful of the dog and forced Officer Tuscairt to shoot the dog. Had Officer Tuscairt not been allowed to have a gun in the first place, this innocent poor cuddly puppy would still be alive today. It’s time for sensible gun legislation. Stand up for your right to live in a safe and civil society, free from harm by an individual receiving a government paycheck. If it’s fair for the citizens, it’s fair for the government too. Demand gun control on government officials.